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er shake thy helmet, nor smite the earth with thy lance? Dost
thou not even appeal to thy father Jove? Begone then! and quit the
acres of the Campus once so severe, which thou ceasest to care for!
"I have some duty-work to perform to-morrow at break of day in the
Quirinal valley." "What is the occasion?" "Why ask? my friend is going
to be married; only a few are invited!" If we only live to see it,
these things will be done in the broad light of day, and claim to be
registered in the public acts. Meanwhile, there is one grievous source
of pain that clings to these male-brides, that they are incapable
of bearing, and retaining their lords' affections by bringing them
children. No! better is it that nature in this case gives their minds
no power over their bodies! They must die barren! Vain, in their case,
is fat Lyde with her medicated box; vain the holding out their hands to
the nimble Luperci.

Yet even this prodigy of crime is surpassed by the trident of Gracchus
in his gladiator's tunic,[96] when in full flight he traverses the
middle of the arena. Gracchus! more nobly born than the Manlii, and
Marcelli, and Catulus' and Paulus' race, and the Fabii, and all the
spectators in the front row. Ay, even though you add to these the very
man himself, at whose expense he cast his net as Retiarius.

That there are departed spirits, and realms beneath the earth--that
Charon's pole exists, and the foul frogs in the Stygian whirlpool--and
that so many thousand souls cross its waters in a single bark, not
even boys believe, save those as yet too young to be charged for their
bath.[97] But do thou believe them true! What does Curius feel, and
the two Scipios, what Fabricius and the shades of Camillus, what the
legion cut off at Cremera, and the flower of Roman youth slaughtered
at Cannæ--so many martial spirits--what do they feel when such a shade
as this passes from us to them? They would long to be cleansed from
the pollution of the contact, could any sulphur and pine-torches be
supplied to them, or could there be a bay-tree to sprinkle them with
water.

To such a pitch of degradation are we come![98] We have, indeed,
advanced our arms beyond Juverna's shore, and the Orcades[99] recently
subdued, and the Britons content with night contracted to its briefest
span. But those abominations which are committed in the victorious
people's city are unknown to those barbarians whom we have conquered.
"Yet there _is_ a story told of one, an Armenian Zalates, who, more
effeminate than the rest of his young countrymen, is reported to have
yielded to the tribune's lust." See the result of intercourse with
Rome! He came a hostage! Here they learn to be _men_! For if a longer
tarry in the city be granted to these youths, they will never lack a
lover. Their plaids, and knives, and bits, and whips, will soon be
discarded. Thus it is the vices of our young nobles are aped even at
Artaxata.[100]

FOOTNOTES:

[83] Alluding to the comic exclamation, "O Cœlum, O Terra, O Maria
Neptuni." Vid. Ter., Adelph., v., i., 4. Cf. Sat. vi., 283.

[84] _Nuper._ The allusion is to Domitian and his niece Julia, who died
from the use of abortives (cf. Plin., iv., Epist. xi.: "Vidua abortu
periit"), cir. A.D. 91. This, therefore, fixes the date of the Satire,
which was probably one of Juvenal's earliest, and written when he was
about thirty. Cf. Sat. xiii., 17.

[85] Cf. vi., 368.

[86] _Vexantur._ E somno excitantur, alluding to "Lex Julia Dormis?"
Cf. i., 126.

[87] The whole of this ironical defense contains the bitterest satire
upon the women of Rome, as all these crimes he proves in the 6th Satire
to be of every-day occurrence.

[88] _Puellæ._ Cf. Sat. ix., 70, _seq._

[89] _Cylindros_, called, vi., 459, "Elenchos." Cf. Arist., Fr., 300,
ἑλικτῆρες.

[90] _Nudus_, i. e., in the Roman sense, without the toga.

[91] _Cotytto_ herself, the goddess of licentiousness, was wearied with
their impurities.

[92] _Actoris._ Æn., xii., 94.

[93] _Bebriacum_, between Verona and Cremona, where the deciding battle
was fought between Otho and Vitellius.

[94] _Gracchus._ In the same manner Nero was married to one Pythagoras,
"in modum solennium conjugiorum denupsisset." Tac., Ann., xv., 37. He
repeated the same act with Sporus.

[95] _Flammea._ Vid. Tac., u. s. "Inditum imperatori flammeum, visi
auspices, dos, et genialis torus et faces nuptiales: cuncta denique
spectata, quæ etiam in feminâ nox operit."

[96] _Tunicati._ Vid. Sat. vi., 256; viii., 203. Movet ecce tridentem.
Credamus tunicæ, etc.

[97] _Nondum ære lavantur._ The fee was a quadrans: vi., 447.

[98] _Traducimur._ Cf. viii., 17. Squalentes traducit avos.

[99] _Modo captas Orcadas._ A.D. 78, Clinton, F. R. "Insulas quas
Orcadas vocant, invenit domuitque." Tac., Agric., c. x.; cf. c.
xii. "Dierum spatia ultra nostri orbis mensuram: _nox_ clara, et
extremâ Britanniæ parte _brevis_, ut finem atque initium lucis exiguo
discrimine internoscas."

[100] _Referunt._ Cf. i., 41. "Multum _referens_ de Mæcenate supino."
The fashion is not only _carried_ back to Armenia, but _copied_ there.
_Prætextatus._ Cf. i., 78. _Artaxata_, the capital of Armenia, was
taken by Corbulo, A.D. 58.

SATIRE III.

Although troubled at the departure of my old friend, yet I can not but
commend his intention of fixing his abode at Cumæ, now desolate, and
giving the Sibyl one citizen at least. It is the high road to Baiæ, and
has a pleasant shore; a delightful retreat. I prefer even Prochyta[101]
to the Suburra. For what have we ever looked on so wretched or so
lonely, that you would not deem it worse to be in constant dread of
fires, the perpetual falling-in of houses, and the thousand dangers of
the cruel city,[102] and poets spouting in the month of August.[103]
But while his whole household is being stowed in a single wagon, my
friend Umbritius halted at the ancient triumphal arches[104] and the
moist Capena. Here, where Numa used to make assignations with his
nocturnal mistress, the grove of the once-hallowed fountain and the
temples are in our days let out to Jews, whose whole furniture is a
basket and bundle of hay.[105] For every single tree is bid to pay a
rent to the people, and the Camenæ having been ejected, the wood is
one mass of beggars. We descended into the valley of Egeria and the
grottoes, so altered from what nature made them. How much more should
we feel the influence of the presiding genius of the spring,[106]
if turf inclosed the waters with its margin of green, and no marble
profaned the native tufo. Here then Umbritius began:[107]

"Since at Rome there is no place for honest pursuits, no profit to be
got by honest toil--my fortune is less to-day than it was yesterday,
and to-morrow must again make that little less--we purpose emigrating
to the spot where Dædalus put off his wearied wings, while my gray
hairs are still but few, my old age green and erect; while something
yet remains for Lachesis to spin, and I can bear myself on my own legs,
w

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